Del Amitri’s Ode to indifference
"Nothing ever happens" is Del Amitri’s ode to public apathy. The song’s lyrics describe our dystopian preoccupation with the frivolous and the inane. All that “Angry, from Manchester” can think to complain about “is all the repeats on TV.” It is an incisive and thoroughly pessimistic vision of contemporary [non-] culture. Triple-M played it yesterday on the radio.In a round-about way related, one of the many Australians currently flirting with SE Asia’s harsh drug laws has just been released from her Bali jail, after serving a 3-month sentence for possession of ecstasy.
Michelle Leslie’s release comes just days after her conviction, as her time served was considered in her sentence. The Sydney underwear model is due to return to her millionaire boyfriend shortly, to resume her life and career.
Leslie’s trial, conviction and sentence stands in stark contrast to another camera friendly young women, Schapelle Corby, also banged up in Bali, but for 20 years instead, for possession of cannabis. While Corby has been all theatrics and media exclusives, Leslie has been a ‘model’ pious convict; donning an Islamic headscarf for her court appearances and feigning shy [or ‘under-stated beauty’], in the face of the media scrum.
Until now; this whole charade has quickly been brushed aside on her return to Australia. Leslie’s modest demeanour has been jettisoned, ‘her people’ are negotiating exclusive media deals and a g-string, instead of a burka, will again become de rigeur.
Cue: politicians’ condemnation of convicted drug-user selling her story; Muslim leaders warning against modelling underwear; and church family and church groups complaining of Leslie sending mixed messages to the nation’s already confused youth.
But in the parallel world of minor celebrity, anything seems possible. A Leslie ‘family spokesperson’ [lawyer/publicist?] has denied that proceeds of crime laws apply, as – he quoted – “she is innocent” of the crimes that she was found guilty of in a Bali court.
Personally, I say good luck to her. I think it’s great that people can make money from milking squalid little episodes like this. That New Idea magazine and Channels 7 and 9 believe their readers and viewers are interested in what Leslie has to say – and they are willing to pay money to hear it/ see it – epitomises Del Amitri’s ode to public apathy.
And what do cultural sensitivities mean in this world? Well, bugger all, really. So what if Leslie dons Islamic garb during her trail to win sympathy, insisting she is a "not a fake Muslim", and then claims to follow her "own version" of Islam when she models underwear in provocative poses?
It’s all just superfluous guff, concocted to sell more crap to indifferent consumer who don’t know better. And if you get to see a girl in a bikini, all the better.
John Howard and his Ministers, conservative opinion makers, religious and family groups may howl in protest that someone convicted of drug possession can make money out of the ordeal. But Australians abide by the rule of law. If it is adjudged that Leslie can sell her story legally, it is only because we live in the shallow, apathetic and sordid world of our choosing.
If no one cares, if "American businessmen snap-up Van Goghs for the price of a hospital wing", we only have our nonchalant non-culture to blame, as reflected in the stand-for-nothing politicians we elect and decisions we make each day, from where we buy our lettuce to which TV programs we watch.
If Howard truly believed in the socially conservative values he espouses, would he be liberalising media ownership laws, deregulating the labour market and refusing to regulate advertising? Celebrity and making a quick buck are driving forces towards behind the brave new world created by his Liberal free-market economics.
We are bombarded daily with puff pieces like this Leslie story, from Australian Idol to Big Brother and crappy adverts for “products that nobody needs”, to combat irrational fears and insecurities implanted in us by advertisers. It serves to divert our attention, to occupy our time and to propagate the next generation of passive consumers of tripe.
The final irony of Del Amitri’s laconic ode, is that most of the song’s ‘consumers’ will ignorantly sing along, oblivious to the whole point of the lyrics.
In other news, the Mother and twin-brother of convicted Melbourne man Van Nguyen have flown into Singapore to be with him before he is execution by hanging next month for attempting to smuggle heroin into Australia.
Monday, November 21, 2005
Sh!t
HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"
WIFE: "Why not - don't you like being married?"
HUSBAND: "Of course I do."
WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"
HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again."
WIFE: "You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)."
HUSBAND: (makes audible groan).
WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"
HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"
WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"
HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do."
WIFE: "Would you play golf with her?"
HUSBAND: "I guess so."
WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?"
HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."
WIFE: - - - silence - - -
HUSBAND: "Sh!t"
Gregan to bow out?
This game will round off Australia’s 2005 international fixtures and will be Gregan’s 50th game as captain.
I am not a founder member of the “Get Gregan” campaign, but I have become a keen advocate – at least an ‘active committee member’ – during 2005.
Sadly, like all the best despots, he has hung on too long. Now, instead of being remember as the tough-as-nuts player, inspirational captain and great ambassador for the game he was, he will be remembered as someone Eddie Jones refused to drop and kept his place long after his form suggested he should.
I cannot remember the last time he emulated William Webb-Ellis and picked up the ball and ran with, or for that matter, kicked. His role has reduced to simply shipping the ball out. Defences no longer have to watch the fringes for a sniping half-back. But even in his passing his technique has failed him. His hop-skip-jump-pass routine – instead of passing off the ground – has restricted the time his first receiver has had to play the ball. Larkham, Gitteau, Tuqiri and Latham have all thrived on getting the ball early and using it, rather than being used as a battering ram with no time on the ball.
And Gregan’s leadership must now be questioned to. In at least four of the seven straight losses the Wallabies were in the box seat midway through the second half. They should have had the wherewithal to close the games out.
Gregan’s contract theoretically sees him through to the 2007 World Cup, but he should go now, so that the Jones – or whoever is coach this Christmas – has time to build a team capable of winning. This team will feature the likes of Henjak, Gerrard and Mitchell, rather than Gregan and Sailor.
1. ?
2. Paul
3. Young
4. Sharpe
5. Vickerman / Chisholm
6. Roe
7. Smith
8. Lyons
9. Henjak
10. Larkham / Rogers
11. Tuqiri
12. Gitteau
13. Rathbone / Mortlock
14. Mitchell
15. Latham
16. Gerrard
17. Turanui
18. Waugh
19. Baxter
The only consolation is that the All Blacks have once again hit between World Cups (almost to the month), instead of at them.
Saturday, November 19, 2005
Australia discovers the round-ball game
Australia last made the finals in 1974. Four years ago, they fell at the last hurdle, losing against Iran in the play-offs. This time round they went one better and won on penalties in a thrilling finish.
With defeat at the hands of the Poms in the cricket and with the rugby union team loosing 7 straight, Aussie sports fans were looking for a team to get behind. (The Kangaroos will of course win this year’s Tri-Nations Rugby League, again.) They have found it in the Footballer-roos (or the Socceroos, as they are sometimes called).
So Germany beckons. Unfortunately, Wednesday night’s performance, though good enough to beat the Uruguayans, was still a long way of the mark. To make the trip worthwhile, there is a lot of work to do in the next 6 months and I hope the game’s administrators will line-up a robust set of friendlies to gain that match experience.
A major achievement will be qualification to the last 16, but a ‘success’ would be a win or two draws. Guus Hiddink was the man who took South Korea to the semi-finals in 2002; it will be miraculous if he could achieve half as much with the Socceroos.
Thursday, November 17, 2005
Amateur night
It took Brisbane police just 36 hours to identify and detain, Rodney Watson, a truck driver.
It appears the alleged, Mr Rodney Bruce Watson, has never watched a single episode of NYPD Blue, Numb3rs, Spooks or even Police Academy 5. He has almost certainly never watched CSI: Crime Scenes Investigators. Even a cursory perusal of these TV programs will at least give you an inkling of how to go about committing a crime and standing a chance of getting away with it.
But his forensic bungles betray him as someone so utterly dim-witted, he perhaps deserves to locked up for his own safety.
His blunders really began the moment he decided to get out of bed that morning. On the day in question, Mr Watson was on a delivery job through Brisbane. It was also his birthday.
But when plotting an elaborate bomb hoax would you:
- Leave your fingerprints at each of the phone boxes you used to make your threats?
- Make no attempt to disguise your voice on the phone?
- Use a phone box on a petrol station forecourt, under the glare of at least half a dozen security cameras?
- Leave delivery dockets in the truck you used, outlining which suburbs you had visited that day?
…And this is the best one…
- Use a truck with a GPS tracking system engaged, so his exact whereabouts, at all times, can be verified?
It seems Mr Watson wasn’t the brightest hoaxer the around, yet he did manage to grind Brisbane’s public transport to a complete halt for an hour, quite a feat for someone with the criminal subtlety of Shaggy from Scooby Doo.
Alas, for his birthday antics, if found guilty, he could face a considerable jail sentence – up to 5 years.
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
Peoples' vision diverges from Mayor's
Brisbane city must accommodate 145,000 new dwellings by 2026. This has forced a rethink of the current City Plan, which as it stands, cannot cater for this level of growth.
In a break from the top-down, zoned approach of the past, Brisbane City Council (BCC) is attempting to refine its new plan in close consultation with residents through the ‘Neighbourhood Planning’ process.
But what happens when the residents begin to disagree with the politicians? As we move through the process, it is becoming more apparent that current Lord Mayoral policy - namely building tunnels - is increasingly at odds with a public becoming more informed by the day.
The Neighbourhood Planning process began by suggesting four ‘city shapes’; theoretical macro-level models on future urban growth in Brisbane.
The four City Shapes were:
 1. Compact City - development would be focussed on the existing CBD, with higher density dwellings progressively giving way to medium and then to low-density. |  2. Dispersed City - would see small neighbourhood centres established with minor employment precincts. Housing density – though generally more even than other options – would be slightly more focused on these micro-centres. |
 3. Corridor City - would see higher density mixed use development focussed along major and enhanced [public] transport routes, with blocks set back from the routes retained for lower density living areas. The corridors need not radiate out from the CBD but may connect other major centres. |  4. Multi-centred City - would see a network of hierarchical centres of employment, service and mixed-use development. Improved public transport, cycle ways and pedestrian routes would link the centres. |
The consultation has so far revealed a strong preference for the ‘Multi-centred’ and the ‘Corridor city’, from widespread – if simplistic - polling. Residents have been attracted by the prospects of these models reducing traffic congestion and improving public transport opportunities, whilst supporting a pattern of development which will draw employment and services closer to their neighbourhoods.
At the centre of it all is a strategy to improve land use efficiency – ie increase density – to allow public transport routes to become viable and to reduce the Brisbane’s reliance on the motor car. The regional plan prescribed an urban footprint and a dwelling target. BCC must now demonstrate where, when and how this growth will be accommodated.
More detailed consultation – which has included a residents' conference ("CityShape Conference") – is now fleshing out public priorities, within the framework provided by the preferred CityShape.
The results from the conference are particularly heartening and show that - when given the information, the time and the space to discuss issues - people will make well thought out decisions.
Analysis of the conference proceedings reveal the following priorities: (Out of 491 total)
| Theme | No. of messages |
| Transport | |
| Promote car alternatives | 7 |
| Better public transport linkages | 7 |
| Improve range of public transport | 2 |
| Deploy public transport initiatives | 1 |
| Improve multi-modal transport safety | 1 |
| Housing | |
| Promote “Urban village” concept and suburban housing mix | 33 |
| Protect character housing (“Queenslanders”) | 5 |
| Regulate to achieve more sustainable development outcomes | 8 |
| Community involvement in planning decisions | 5 |
| Habitat / Sustainability | |
| Protection of bushland and biodiversity on private and public land | 14 |
| Secure recreational open space | 3 |
| Improve suburban streetscape | 2 |
| Community | |
| Fairness in service provision | 1 |
| Economy and infrastructure | |
| Implement integrated water management | 11 |
| Infrastructure to lead development | 2 |
| Implement user/developer pays system of infrastructure charging | 1 |
What is evolving is a preferred pattern of development which begins to shift Brisbane towards being a more sustainable city; with reduced transport demand, protected green space, stringent building codes and [re]creating communities as employment, service and social hubs.
Unfortunately, the CityShape delegates are getting ahead of general public and dominant political opinion.
While delegates are talking of massive investment in public transport and pedestrian infrastructure, we have a council administration voted in to spend $5.2 billion on road tunnels.
And while delegates see huge opportunities to enforce more sustainable housing and development standards, we have a State government too weak to mandate solar hot water systems and rainwater tanks on all new dwellings, for fear of upsetting developers.
Nowhere do the CityShape delegates talk about more bitumen, more travel demand and unsustainable development as being part of the answer.
Despite the best will in the world – and an independent selection panel – the delegates to the conference did not represent the ‘average’ Brisbane resident. To put forward their name for nomination they would have been already committed to making Brisbane a better place. In general, they probably came from a better educated and a more activist background. Therefore, they would have been more progressive in the their thinking about growth management issues.
When presented with the draft CityShape, the delegates effectively said “Good start, but it's a bit timid.”
The challenge remains to lift the level of broader understanding above that of the 10-second sound-bite on which modern elections are decided. More roads is easy to sell, particularly when couched in terms of ‘fixing’ the perceived congestion issue. Dismal failure is only apparent once billions of dollars have already been squandered.
The CityShape conference opened people up to new ideas and provided the freedom to arrive at answers far more sophisticated than ‘just more of the same’.
Unfortunately, the final document will remain timid. The findings of the conference reveal that informed public opinion is at odds with current political doctrine and the Lord Mayor will not be swayed in his ambition to build Brisbane out of traffic congestion.
He is unshakable in his belief that he was voted in to build his tunnels and that building tunnels is the answer. So what if a bunch of lefties, academics and busy-bodies came up with a different answer?
The next stage of the consultation process is go back to the communities. Newman has demanded we reach out to the 'Mums and Dads' who are his constituency backbone, but who are traditionally exceedingly difficult to attract to consultation events, unless something is about to impact on their house price.
Here, Newman feels safe. Here, the punters will agree with him because they will not devote the time to explore the issues. This is Liberal country.
However, the final CityShape – though it may end up something of a dog’s breakfast – will be yet another factor lying contrary to the Lord Mayor’s proposal to build tunnels across Brisbane, alongside peak oil, issues over the value of public-private partnerships, the State government’s Regional Plan, changing housing demands and an aging population.
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
Brisbane pops its cherry
Police received a series of phone calls warning that 8 bombs (4 on trains and 4 on buses) were set to go off at midday. A later phone call warned of a bomb set to go off at 5pm.
In response the State government decided to shut down trains and buses for 15 mins either side of noon and 5pm and evacuate the buses and trains for this period. Surrounding buildings were supposed to be cleared, but communication failed to get the message through adequately.
Police have not yet declared it was a hoax, but I guess the fact that there were no bombs indicates, perhaps, that it was.
The phone calls were made from two phone boxes in Enoggera and Carina, now subject of intense police forensic scrutiny.
Over the period of the operation yesterday, police also received a number of phone calls warning of suspicious packages.
Did the Queensland government overreact? It was only last week that a number of terrorist suspects were arrested in Sydney and Melbourne as a result of a change in federal law, which made their apprehension lawful. It is alleged that an attack was planned and imminent. Of course, for legal and operational reasons, the whereabouts of such an attack and the nature of its ‘imminence’ cannot be verified for its veracity; we will just have to trust the Howard government on this one.
In this heightened climate of suspicion – when Howard reminds Australians to be ‘alert’ but not ‘alarmed’ – it is not surprising that Queensland authorities erred on the side of caution. In this respect, I would agree with them.
I would much prefer to go through the inconvenience of facing a periodic public transport shut down than being subject to a Howard government’s arbitrary law making, where it seems it will make a law to arrest a defined set of people.
Monday, November 14, 2005
Photos from Jimna State Forest
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
Downer's right, you know
After all, it is becoming so difficult to determine who are pirates and who are terrorists, particularly since these days pirate ships seem never to fly the skull and crossbones.
Worse, some fair dinkum terrorists are now flying the old Jolly Roger, pretending to be pirates. Some have even taken the step of growing black beards, cheeky devils.
So you can understand the predicament that Lord Downer finds himself in.
Some naysayers might accuse Downer of trying to manipulate the event in an effort to raise public anxiety over the global threat of terror. But this is unfair.
That there has been 27 similar events in the region since March attributed to pirates does not mean that this attack was not terrorism.
That this attack occurred off the coast of the most politically unstable region in the world also does not mean that this time it wasn’t terrorists.
That this government has muddied the waters before - linking boat people with terrorists during the Tampa affair in 2001 - does not mean that it would try such dubious tactics again.
That this government is currently attempting to introduce draconian, and possibly illegal, counter-terrorism laws, again, does not mean that it is trying to scare voters into thinking that there are terrorists everywhere.
People should stop being so circumspect and accept Howard’s honest, fair and unprejudiced government for what it is.
Kyoto to bring chaos to UK economy (says right wing think tank)
According to a new report from the pro-market think tank, International Council for Capital Formation (ICCF), the UK’s economy will be devastated if it attempts to meet its Kyoto targets.
Meeting its obligations will knock 1.1% off its economy by the mid-point in the target period, 2010.
This is terrible news.
What this means is that in June 2010 the UK economy will stand at just $2,026,240,000,000 – 14.8% higher than in 2005, instead of a paltry $2,045,850,000,000, just 13.7% higher.
If the UK economy is to reach the dizzy heights of that non-Kyoto scenario, UK residents will have to wait until another 4½ months beyond June, until mid-October. Clearly, this is unacceptable.
Clive Hamilton called this irrational obsession with economic expansion at all costs, a growth fetish.
This silly report from a rather obscure – and utterly right-leaning – think tank seems to be getting far more coverage than it deserves.
But the timing’s right; the Kyoto renegades are buoyed by the continued recalcitrant position of Australia and the US and UK Prime Minister Tony Blair’s has apparently weakened his – up till now – firm pro-Kyoto stance. A new climate change regime is on the horizon. One driven by altruism and sharing technology, not milestones.
While the UK public service buckles under the weight of government imposed targets, Blair obviously feels that any carbon emissions reduction regime doesn’t need them.
Instead, all that's required is a few weasel words like ‘commitment’ and ‘moving forwards’ and then we blame it all on those dam Chinese who all seem to think they have a right to own a fridge. Meanwhile, we demand energy to relay ourever-expanding backsides up an escalator because we are too lazy to walk.
Economics is accountancy without numbers. Plug in any assumption you like and you’ll get the answer you want. And never, never ask your theoretical model a question you don’t want to know the answer to, like what is the cost to economy of say, the Maldives, if greenhouse gas emissions are not curbed by 2010?
Meanwhile, the World Energy Outlook suggests that global energy demand will grow by 51% by 2030. If no inroads are made to reduce emissions (and lets face it, strong rhetoric will achieve very little), mitigating the greenhouse effect will start to become very costly indeed.
Monday, November 07, 2005
Good weekend for the armchair sportsman..
One Aussie team does well….
Punter Ponting’s men have finally found some and focus. After crashing in the Ashes over the winter, they have dispatched a World XI in 3 ODIs and a Test and now crushing – utterly – an enthusiastic West Indies team in the first Test in Brisbane.
Long gone are the days of illustrious Windies teams, but this team was still expected to put up some fight. In the end, each passing day of the Test exposed an ever-growing gap in application and spirit.
It was a tale of two tails. The Australian tail wagged hard - the last four batsmen making 137 – and pushed an average score well above respectability. On both occasions, the West Indies tail offered less resistance than Andrex puppy facing down a steamroller. In the first innings they made 6, in the second, they didn’t even reach those dizzying heights. Their inability to make runs is matched only by their total failure to even occupy the crease, to at least allow a remaining batsman to push on.
It is difficult to see the Windies recover from this, but then I said the same of England after the first test. The big difference is leadership. Whereas England had both gritty and charismatic leadership, the West Indies appear to have none.
Another team does OK…..
It was a 4am start for the football on Sunday. It was worth it though, as even the atrocious Wigan weather couldn’t spoil a gutsy game. Scott Prince definitely has a future with the Kangaroos, but his debut was pretty nondescript. His distribution was one-dimensional and his kicking was downright poor.
But this couldn’t prevent the accomplished stars – Tate, Minnacello, Lockyer, Gasnier, Cooper et al from eventually unlocking the GB side and winning the game comfortably in the end.
NZ will remain tough to beat though.
But another Aussie side was simply awful…
No point in me writing anything… A colleague at work gave a thorough analysis via email this morning:
“Gregan is no longer a threat to defences, so opponents don't have to allocate any defence to him, hence they can smother our other backs. Oh, for the great days when Gregan would snipe and then have the option of Larkham outside, Horan further out with a cut-out pass, or the inside flick to Finegan or Kefu!
Gregan has to go, and Giteau should be his replacement. Then we can try Rogers / Latham alternating at flyhalf/fullback, with Johanson at 12 because Turunui is not up to test level. And we have to stop trying to make Tuqiri play like Daniel Herbert - he's not a battering ram. Reserve halfback should be Henjack, because good though he is, Whitaker is 32 and not an option for the future.
Right, that's the backs dealt with. Now for the real problem area.
I've never seen a Wallaby forward pack look less like they had been coached in the basics or had any idea of what they were supposed to do. And Jones is directly culpable here, because he never said anything post-match about the team departing from the 'game plan' - his comments were all about incompetence. The logical conclusion from that is that there was either:
(a) no game plan or
(b) the game plan was to play boring, one-dimensional, bash and barge football and hope the French would switch off through boredom.
The set piece - where do we start? Sure, we stole some of their lineouts, but who cares when our own lineouts were marginal at best? Elsom is not a third option as a jumper, and that's only one of his flaws. Our blockers (Dunning, Baxter and Waugh) were ineffective and lazy, and the holes in our line were atrocious - at least twice, Sharpe tapped balls down and they were grabbed by French locks (yes, locks, not flankers!).
That is unforgivable and Jones should have been on to that more quickly. Our hookers can't throw straight; time to give the under 21 bloke a run - we couldn't do any worse. With each test we play these days, Michael Foley is becoming a bigger loss, both as a player and as a coach.
The scrum - oh goodness me, have we ever had a worse one? Not in my time watching the Wallabies, and that goes back to the late 60s. Dunning is big but looks very unfit and has bugger all technical skills; Baxter has some decent skills but is far too light to play tight-head. Maybe an option there would be to switch him to the other side?
The locks need to be told that part of their job is to push in scrums, and Phil Waugh needs the same dressing down - he's far too eager to bind loosely to get a flying start, rather than contributing to scrum stability.
George Smith is a wonderful player but is wasted at number 8. It's a mark of the man that despite being handicapped [by being played out of position], he is still our most effective general play contributor.
So what to do? Given that we must accept that for this tour, we do not have Larkham or Flatley to provide some sanity and stability to the backline, we must play the cards we've been dealt.
And we must also accept that the past 5 years have seen the departure of a group of players who would collectively rank as among the Wallabies' best ever - it's easy to forget the names we've lost: Andrew Blades, Richard Harry, Michael Foley, Phil Kearns, Ewen McKenzie, David Giffen, Owen Finegan, David Wilson, Toutai Kefu, Matt Cockbain, Tim Horan, Jason Little, Matt Burke, Ben Tune, oh and that bloke called John Eales too. I defy any country to lose players of that calibre and remain at the top.
My great complaint is not that we've declined, that was in some ways inevitable. But I can't abide the apparent rudderless nature of our decline - Wallaby rugby is not attractive to watch any more, and it's been a long time since I've felt that way.
So let's write off the rest of this tour from a results perspective - let's start to build a team capable of being developed for France in 2007. Here's an initial 'experimental' XV I'd like to see (from within those on the current tour), with Ewen McKenzie to take Jones's job if he can't improve the team's patterns and attitude over the next 3 tests:
1. Greg Holmes (QLD)
2. Tatafu Polota-Nau (NSW)
3. David Fitter (ACT)
4. Nathan Sharpe (QLD/WF) - but on his final warning!
5. Adam Wallace-Harrison (ACT)
6. Hugh McMeniman (QLD)
7. George Smith (ACT) (c)
8. John Roe (QLD)
9. Matt Giteau (ACT)
10. Mat Rogers (NSW)
11. Wendell Sailor (QLD)
12. Lloyd Johannson (QLD/WF)
13. Lote Tuqiri (NSW)
14. Drew Mitchell (QLD)
15. Chris Latham (QLD)
Reserves:
16. Stephen Moore (QLD) – hooker
17. Al Baxter (NSW) - prop (only until they get home, then Ben someone from the under 21s should take over)
18. Leroy Houston (NSW) – backrow
19. Phil Waugh (NSW) – backrow
20. Mark Chisolm (ACT) – lock
21. Matt Henjak (ACT/WF) – halfback
22. Cameron Shepherd (NSW/WF) - outside back”
Sunday, November 06, 2005
The Central Bearded Dragon
Rather cleverly, our resident bearded dragon population (now at least 3 adults and 1 juvenile) has taken to following me round the yard when I'm mowing the lawn.
Far from being twitchy about rapidly spinning blades, they follow three of four paces behind you, picking up the insects disturbed by the mower.
Then, when you turn to come back, they scurry for cover.
This (grumpy-looking) chap, is nearly 2 feet long: not the most colourful, but certainly the biggest in the neighbourhood.
Obviously, the key to retaining wildlife in your yard is lack of pets, and indeed cats get short-shrift when they venture into my garden. You might be a cat-person, or a dog-person - but isn't it better to create a wildlife sanctuary around your home?
It would be a long-shot to expect a snake to take up residency, but with at least two possums coming through the yard each night, its a possibility.
(I now seemed to have solved the cane-toad problem by investing in two big compost bins and keeping all the composting rubbish out the way. That's one bit of wildlife not welcome.)
Guambat Stew: Pinkos and Greenies
Friday, November 04, 2005
Goodthinkful voters have choice
“The purpose of Newspeak was not only to provide a medium of expression for the worldview and mental habits proper to the devotees of Ingsoc, but to make all other modes of thought impossible. It was intended that when Newspeak had been adopted once and for all and Oldspeak forgotten, a heretical thought -- that is, a thought diverging from the principles of Ingsoc – should be literally unthinkable.”
John Howard is facing concerted opposition trying to convince Australians that his proposed Industrial Relations (IR) reforms will be good for them. Despite a spectacularly expensive promotional campaign – potentially costing $100 million within the year – still the majority of people remain opposed to the changes.
Sending the right message to pedestrians
This city-wide surrender is reflected at a local level through poorly designed pedestrian- and cycle-crossings at suburban intersections. People talk of connectivity, of walking more; getting out of their cars, but there is little incentive to do so. “Pedestrians – actually ‘people’ – have become second class citizens, to be retro-fitted as an afterthought, once the needs of the motorcar have been satisfied.”
Underlining Brisbane’s twisted logic, recreational opportunities abound for cyclists and pedestrians. There is a network of trails along green corridors (once expanding, now not expanding, thanks to budget cuts to fund tunnels). But unfortunately, few of these routes serve to get people out their cars for the remaining five days in the week. The only welcome cyclist is a ‘lifestyle’ cyclist.
There are countless poor intersections across Brisbane. Whilst simply altering traffic light signals will not singularly get people out of their cars, it is a virtually cost-free initiative that begins to send the message that pedestrians and cyclists are both welcome and equal users of the city’s road network. “It is about reclaiming just a small piece of space and time amongst the traffic, for people.”
To my amazement, Cr Flesser phoned back the day he received the letter and we spoke on the phone for half an hour. He will log my specific request re: the intersection of Toombul and Melton Roads and will have a report prepared. He also clarified Labor’s position vis-à-vis the tunnels.
He was understandably a little cagey; not really knowing who I was, what my agenda was or even who I voted for. I challenged him that Labor was simply rolling over, accommodating Newman’s plans, despite Labor holding the majority – and thus controlling the budget – over the Liberals in Council.
It seems the Labor group is still shit-scared of the press – notably The Courier-Mail. In the fallout of the last election after Brisbane residents voted in this dysfunctional Council, the Labor Group got burned during period of jockeying for power.
Regardless of where the institutional power lay in Council, whenever the Labor group blocked Newman, they were slated in the paper. In time they were cowed into a compliant (majority) opposition. With The C-M tub-thumping over infrastructure and Newman setting out to spend $4.7 billion dollars on roads, Brisbane’s politics had reached a comfortable nexus.
But The C-M is no longer in awe of Newman, nor his tunnels. Since the State government kicked off its regional planning agenda, the community, the media and the politicians have undergone a massive learning process. This is reflected in a more considered view emanating from the editorial desk at The Courier-Mail, with space commonly devoted to critical opinion pieces.
Residents are now no longer sure the answer lies in simply bigger and more expensive infrastructure – especially of the road and tunnel variety.
Cr Flesser assured me that we will start to see a more vocal Labor Group. Their support of the Airport Link is limited solely to funding feasibility study and they will challenge Newman on the business sustainability of the North South Bypass Tunnel if - when the two tenders come in – it goes above Brisbane City Council’s line of credit with the State government.
This is heartening, as although the majority of Brisbane residents probably still support more roads, the higher the quality of debate, the more sceptical they become.
Thursday, November 03, 2005
Plausible deniability
- The ability to lie or disclaim responsibility convincingly.
- The inability to lie or disclaim responsibility convincingly.
Don Watson (Weasel Words) defines plausible deniability as:
“A political doctrine developed in the 1950s ad applied to CIA operations. Deliberately loose chains of command enable the President and others in high office to deny giving any instructions that have gone wrong.”
“The doctrine failed in the case of Watergate because the President was not plausible. It also fails when those given the instructions take the combination of the President’s blessing and his apparent unwillingness to know anything about the consequences as a license to do what they like.”
So what are we to make of this statement about the existence of secret ‘black sites’ from Whitehouse spokesman Scott McClellan:
"I am not going into discussing any specific intelligence activities”
"I would say that the President's most important responsibility is to protect the American people."
The Washington Post article and McClellan’s comments make it pretty clear that the US has been maintaining off-shore prison camps around the world. Here, ‘suspects’ (of what???) are being held indefinitely and beyond the reach of US law, unlike those fortunate souls being held at Guantanamo Bay.
A Four Corners report last week focused on the plight of Australian man David Hicks, now into his 4th year of military detention in Cuba, without recourse to civil law. Hicks has been abandoned by the Australian government and is now suffering from severe mental illness, having spent the last 12 months in solitary confinement.
Hicks’s US military appointed lawyer, who will be representing him in the quasi-legal court in Cuba paints a very different picture of Hicks’s involvement with Taliban from that suggested by John Howard, the Whitehouse et al. Rather than being a singularly dangerous terrorist, capable and willing to blow up New York tomorrow, it is alleged that Hicks did not even fire a shot in Afghanistan and was even in Pakistan, travelling, on 9/11.
When the Northern Alliance captured him, he was waiting at a Taxi rank, looking for lift out of there. He was sold to the Americans for $1,000.
The truth maybe somewhat different from his lawyer’s story, but it is clear that Hicks is not a clear and present danger to global (or American) security interests, which justifies his continued unlawful incarceration as political prisoner. His lawyer even proffered that he was ‘the token white man’, locked up solely to sell the message that the US was not just going after Arabs.
So if Hicks is detained on spurious grounds, we have ample reason for doubting America’s intentions and justification for secret camps for political prisoners.
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
Contemporary cliches, Cant & Management Jargon explained
To be honest, he was more known as a straight shooter and would only lapse when his boss required evasive action, spin, or to say with ‘absolute certainty’, when he means ‘possibly, maybe not, what do you take this government for?’
Not only is Weasel Words genius satire (comparable to the very, very English The Meaning of Liff, by Douglas Adams), but it also a cautionary tale and a reference guide everyone who writes published information should read.
Watson argues many of his weasel words began life as anything but. However, now they have since had the meaning ‘sucked out of them’. Why? Well, in many instances this was done purposefully – to make sure they became empty vessels that could be later re-translated to mean the exact opposite, if required.
But also, the management consultant revolution has reframed and conjoined words to make their profession utterly impenetrable to outsiders, in an effort to justify their salaries, other people’s sackings (or offshorings) or their client’s decision to bring them in, in the first place. Not able to parse the words said at them, people can merely parrot them back, thus propagating the nonsense.
However, in their most repugnant form, weasel words are simply euphemisms, designed to hide a truly violent act behind a media and publicly acceptable term: see lit-up, daisy cutter and degrade. The US Department of Defense must have whole sections devoted to poring over thesauruses, concocting new terms for ‘shot in the head’; ones the focus groups are more ‘comfortable’ with.
Before Watson, George Orwell understood the power of semantics when he created Newspeak, the language of Ingsoc, in 1984. Its fictional, sympathetic architects sought to protect their comrades from seditious thoughts by stripping meaning from words, thus rendering thoughtcrime impossible. Thus, “All men are created equal” is a valid Newspeak sentence, were it not for the ludicrous suggestion it makes. All man cannot be of equal size, weight or hair colour. Any notion of ‘political equality’ had been purged, thus no one is able to convey the concept.
As an aside, one point of difference between Orwell and Watson is vocabulary size. While Newspeak sought to cull words – why have both ‘good’ and ‘bad’ when ‘good’ and ‘ungood’ suffices – Watson’s weasel words generate an expanding dictionary of new creations – synergies, professionalisation, keyaccountabilities. But both serves the purposes of the language architects.
What Newspeak and weasel words do share is their goal of restricting thought. For Orwell this served the political objectives of the Party – to remain in absolute power, forever. For Watson it serves any of the interests of anyone who cares to talk this meaningless, evasive, platitudinous language, really wants – to lie, to sell (often the same), to fill pages, to placate or just to sound important.
Extract:
portal
Window, door, gate, etc. means of entrance; ‘portal of knowledge’, hence common in knowledge management and computer science:
Compare to:‘Human-orientated workflow is the next frontier for portal frameworks. The year 2004 will be “the year of the process portal” for portal frameworks, whereas 2001 was the year of the content portal, 2002 application access and 2003 collaboration – with each year adding to the capabilities of those before it. This pattern of feature creep will end with composite applications in 2007, after which portal and composite application frameworks will merge and become indistinguishable.’
International Association for Human Resource
Information Management
‘Twas brillig, and the slithy toves,
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe,
All mimsy were the borogroves,
And the mome raths outgrabe’.
(Ironically, despite Lewis Carroll’s poem, Jabberwocky, being nonsense, it still stirs wonderful imagery and great comic meaning.)
| I am employed by Brisbane City Council. All views expressed in this blog are my own and in no way reflect the views of my employer. |
From WeaselWords.com.au