Thursday, November 17, 2005
Amateur night
Brisbane’s first major terror alert – which closed down the city public transport system twice earlier this week – has officially been declared a hoax, following the arrest of a 46 year old man from Beaudesert.

It took Brisbane police just 36 hours to identify and detain, Rodney Watson, a truck driver.

It appears the alleged, Mr Rodney Bruce Watson, has never watched a single episode of NYPD Blue, Numb3rs, Spooks or even Police Academy 5. He has almost certainly never watched CSI: Crime Scenes Investigators. Even a cursory perusal of these TV programs will at least give you an inkling of how to go about committing a crime and standing a chance of getting away with it.

But his forensic bungles betray him as someone so utterly dim-witted, he perhaps deserves to locked up for his own safety.

His blunders really began the moment he decided to get out of bed that morning. On the day in question, Mr Watson was on a delivery job through Brisbane. It was also his birthday.

But when plotting an elaborate bomb hoax would you:

• Leave your fingerprints at each of the phone boxes you used to make your threats?
• Make no attempt to disguise your voice on the phone?
• Use a phone box on a petrol station forecourt, under the glare of at least half a dozen security cameras?
• Leave delivery dockets in the truck you used, outlining which suburbs you had visited that day?

…And this is the best one…

• Use a truck with a GPS tracking system engaged, so his exact whereabouts, at all times, can be verified?

It seems Mr Watson wasn’t the brightest hoaxer the around, yet he did manage to grind Brisbane’s public transport to a complete halt for an hour, quite a feat for someone with the criminal subtlety of Shaggy from Scooby Doo.

Alas, for his birthday antics, if found guilty, he could face a considerable jail sentence – up to 5 years.

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