Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Del Amitri’s Ode to indifference
"Nothing ever happens" is Del Amitri’s ode to public apathy. The song’s lyrics describe our dystopian preoccupation with the frivolous and the inane. All that “Angry, from Manchester” can think to complain about “is all the repeats on TV.” It is an incisive and thoroughly pessimistic vision of contemporary [non-] culture. Triple-M played it yesterday on the radio.

In a round-about way related, one of the many Australians currently flirting with SE Asia’s harsh drug laws has just been released from her Bali jail, after serving a 3-month sentence for possession of ecstasy.

Michelle Leslie’s release comes just days after her conviction, as her time served was considered in her sentence. The Sydney underwear model is due to return to her millionaire boyfriend shortly, to resume her life and career.

Leslie’s trial, conviction and sentence stands in stark contrast to another camera friendly young women, Schapelle Corby, also banged up in Bali, but for 20 years instead, for possession of cannabis. While Corby has been all theatrics and media exclusives, Leslie has been a ‘model’ pious convict; donning an Islamic headscarf for her court appearances and feigning shy [or ‘under-stated beauty’], in the face of the media scrum.

Until now; this whole charade has quickly been brushed aside on her return to Australia. Leslie’s modest demeanour has been jettisoned, ‘her people’ are negotiating exclusive media deals and a g-string, instead of a burka, will again become de rigeur.

Cue: politicians’ condemnation of convicted drug-user selling her story; Muslim leaders warning against modelling underwear; and church family and church groups complaining of Leslie sending mixed messages to the nation’s already confused youth.

But in the parallel world of minor celebrity, anything seems possible. A Leslie ‘family spokesperson’ [lawyer/publicist?] has denied that proceeds of crime laws apply, as – he quoted – “she is innocent” of the crimes that she was found guilty of in a Bali court.

Personally, I say good luck to her. I think it’s great that people can make money from milking squalid little episodes like this. That New Idea magazine and Channels 7 and 9 believe their readers and viewers are interested in what Leslie has to say – and they are willing to pay money to hear it/ see it – epitomises Del Amitri’s ode to public apathy.

And what do cultural sensitivities mean in this world? Well, bugger all, really. So what if Leslie dons Islamic garb during her trail to win sympathy, insisting she is a "not a fake Muslim", and then claims to follow her "own version" of Islam when she models underwear in provocative poses?

It’s all just superfluous guff, concocted to sell more crap to indifferent consumer who don’t know better. And if you get to see a girl in a bikini, all the better.

John Howard and his Ministers, conservative opinion makers, religious and family groups may howl in protest that someone convicted of drug possession can make money out of the ordeal. But Australians abide by the rule of law. If it is adjudged that Leslie can sell her story legally, it is only because we live in the shallow, apathetic and sordid world of our choosing.

If no one cares, if "American businessmen snap-up Van Goghs for the price of a hospital wing", we only have our nonchalant non-culture to blame, as reflected in the stand-for-nothing politicians we elect and decisions we make each day, from where we buy our lettuce to which TV programs we watch.

If Howard truly believed in the socially conservative values he espouses, would he be liberalising media ownership laws, deregulating the labour market and refusing to regulate advertising? Celebrity and making a quick buck are driving forces towards behind the brave new world created by his Liberal free-market economics.

We are bombarded daily with puff pieces like this Leslie story, from Australian Idol to Big Brother and crappy adverts for “products that nobody needs”, to combat irrational fears and insecurities implanted in us by advertisers. It serves to divert our attention, to occupy our time and to propagate the next generation of passive consumers of tripe.

The final irony of Del Amitri’s laconic ode, is that most of the song’s ‘consumers’ will ignorantly sing along, oblivious to the whole point of the lyrics.

In other news, the Mother and twin-brother of convicted Melbourne man Van Nguyen have flown into Singapore to be with him before he is execution by hanging next month for attempting to smuggle heroin into Australia.

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