Wednesday, September 28, 2005
The Dover heresy

Astonishingly, the administrators at the Dover school, where students maybe forced to learn about intelligent design in their biology class, must read out the following statement to the students, before they commence work on evolution.

With consent from parents, children were allowed to be excused from hearing this message, but horrifically, the teachers themselves could not be excused.

"The Pennsylvania Academic Standards require students to learn about Darwin's Theory of Evolution and eventually to take a standardized test of which evolution is a part.

Because Darwin's Theory is a theory, it continues to be tested as new evidence is discovered. The Theory is not a fact. Gaps in the Theory exist for which there is no evidence. A theory is defined as a well-tested explanation that unifies a broad range of observations.

Intelligent Design is an explanation of the origin of life that differs from Darwin's view. The reference book, Of Pandas and People, is available for students who might be interested in gaining an understanding of what Intelligent Design actually involves.

With respect to any theory, students are encouraged to keep an open mind. The school leaves the discussion of the Origins of Life to individual students and their families. As a Standards-driven district, class instruction focuses upon preparing students to achieve proficiency on Standards-based assessments."

Ref

The great thing about this statement is that it can be adapted to suit any particular concept or theory that is contrary to your world view.

Thus, global warming could be taught in American schools with a similar caveat:

The Pennsylvania Academic Standards require students to learn about Global Warming Darwin's Theory of Evolution and eventually to take a standardized test of which global warming evolution is a part.

Because Global Warming Darwin's Theory is a theory, it continues to be tested as new evidence is discovered. The Theory is not a fact. Gaps in the Theory exist for which there is no evidence. A theory is defined as a well-tested explanation that unifies a broad range of observations.

CoincidenceIntelligent Design is an explanation of why the planet is warming the origin of life that differs from climatologists' Darwin's view. The reference book, Synchrodestiny Of Pandas and People, is available for students who might be interested in gaining an understanding of what Coincidence Intelligent Design actually involves.

With respect to any theory, students are encouraged to keep an open mind. The school leaves the discussion of the thawing of the tundra/melting of the icecaps/warming of the oceans* Origins of Life to individual students and their families. As a Standards-driven district, class instruction focuses upon preparing students to achieve proficiency on Standards-based assessments.

*delete as appropriate

Or even more usefully, it could be used to allow 7th Grade kids to make up their own minds about why we fall out of trees:

The Pennsylvania Academic Standards require students to learn about Newton's Darwin's Theory of Gravity Evolution and eventually to take a standardized test of which gravity evolution is a part.

Because Newton's Darwin's Theory is a theory, it continues to be tested as new evidence is discovered. The Theory is not a fact. Gaps in the Theory exist for which there is no evidence. A theory is defined as a well-tested explanation that unifies a broad range of observations.

Sticky Objects Intelligent Design is an explanation of why we fall out of trees the origin of life that differs from Newton's Darwin's view. The reference book, Humpty Dumpty Of Pandas and People, is available for students who might be interested in gaining an understanding of what Sticky Objects Intelligent Design actually involves.

With respect to any theory, students are encouraged to keep an open mind. The school leaves the discussion of the orbit of the Earth around the Sun Origins of Life to individual students and their families. As a Standards-driven district, class instruction focuses upon preparing students to achieve proficiency on Standards-based assessments.

America is threatened with becoming a laughing stock if the Courts decide that intelligent design can be taught as a legimate alternative to - not just Darwin's- theory of evolution.

Unsurprisingly George W. Bush has waded into the arguemet, the President himself being something of an advocate of intelligent design.

But surely the existence of the President himself is proof that there is no such thing as intelligent design. After all, who would have invented him?

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